His second internship has ended. They were able to give him some leads, but so far none has led to a job. He was just turned down for one he really wanted and seemed perfectly suited for--I mean perfectly.

If anyone knows of an administrative-type job in the Dc area for someone with experience doing political research and report writing, who has fabulous people skills and strong multicultural experience (including experience living in Asia), we would be most grateful if you would pass on the information. You can send it to me, or email me for his email address: cak hyphen edit at comcast dot net

Is this a spectrum or a binary?

I was just reading a post (linked to by someone on my f-list) that referred to being cisgendered as "the concept of living / identifying / presenting as the gender society always expected of you because it was on your birth certificate." (It isn't clear to me whether the person means the virgules (slashes) to mean "and" or "or," and I don't feel free to ask there.)

The one that confuses me is "presenting." What all does that involve, and to what extent? I have mentioned before that when someone says, "Women do this and men do that" or "Men are like this and women are like that"--whether the person is saying it informally or from a position of being an "expert"--I am about as likely to fall into the "men" category as the "women." Therefore, it seems to me that some of my behavior constitutes "presenting" as male, in the eyes of this society. Yes? No? Does wearing clothing sold as "men's" constitute "presenting" as male? Does on occasion being taken for a man--without having intended to be taken specifically as either male or female--and not correcting the person constitute "presenting" as male? If one is taken for male online, has one "presented" as male?

Inquiring minds want to know.

(1) I am at the thrift store. I am second in line, behind the person being waited on, and a woman is in line behind me. Another cashier comes over and opens the register just beyond the one we are in line at. Before she finishes opening, before she can say (as they always do at the thrift store), "I can help the next person in line," the woman behind me goes around me and up to that register, and unloads her cart. WTF? What goes on in a person's head, what space do they live in, that this seems appropriate behavior? (Yes, I know that in some cultures waiting in a line is not standard; when in Korea, for example, do as the Koreans do. But in the Midwest U.S., waiting in a line is standard.) Weird.

(2) Possibly TMI information regarding nausea: ( Read more... )Weird.

(3) Sunday my knees were terrible, but I think that's mainly because I stood up so much at Minn-Stf the day before. But Wednesday I had virtually no pain, then Thursday I was awakened by my hips hurting, and my knees and hips stayed really bad all day; I did pretty much the same activities Tuesday and Wednesday, so I don't think this was due to difference in previous-day activity level. Weird.

Things are going OK. J has no new job prospects, but has signed on with some lists of GLBT and/or poly-friendly professionals (thanks to LJ friends for the links!!). Locals, please keep him in mind for any legal matters.

Our two kids with jobs, E (25-year-old daughter) and P (22-year-old son), took J, younger daughter R, and me out to dinner at TGI Friday's last night in honor of J's 55th birthday. I had forgotten about Convergence (which we don't go to, though we might one of these years), until we got to the Friday's by the Radisson Sheraton and saw the crowded parking lot. The restaurant was packed with fans; I saw a few people I know, but was close enough to say hello only to pgdudda. The family had a good time.

My generous MIL gave us a gift to get the van's A/C fixed, so that problem has been solved.

The city says it has to get special bids on taking down the giant double-trunk elm, because it is in a tricky spot--between our garage and the next-door garage, and very close to the latter. It straddles the property line, so we are equally responsible for the cost, which I'm sure will be huge. Fortunately, if the city takes it down the cost will be assessed across five years, so we hope the next-door neighbors want to go that way, too. I'm very sad about losing this tree, which shades our house and is probably at least 100 years old.

J and I went to the Minn-Stf meeting last Saturday at davidwilford and Erin's, and enjoyed it very much. Good people, good food, good dogs.

I loved this song from the first time I heard it. This is probably the first version I heard, and might still be my favorite:

But this is a close runner-up:

Karl Malden, 1912-2009
One can hardly be sad for someone who made it to 97, married to the same person for more than 70 years. I had no idea he was that old. He was a terrific actor, contributing to some of the classic films such as On the Waterfront and A Streetcar Named Desire, but stands out in my mind for his wonderfully creepy performance in Baby Doll (which is the first movie I recall being aware was on the Catholic Legion of Decency's "condemned" list).

Mollie Sugden, 1922-2009
Another who had a long life and a long marriage. I recognize her face, but I don't know that I ever saw her perform.

Harve Presnell, 1933-2009
He sang "They Call the Wind Maria" in Paint Your Wagon, and that redeemed the whole movie for me:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kCgLNuXSaSc
And from the sublime to the ridiculous--but he was a HUNK!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91m8WGQFjLM&feature=related
In later years, he was a very busy character actor.

Thanks to calimac, who tracked down the link, after we discussed having encountered this idea:

If men are allowed to marry men, they'll all do so, and women will lose out. That's because all men would, in an environment of acceptance, prefer men, but not all women would prefer women.

I'm not making this up.

http://blog.beliefnet.com/kingdomofpriests/2009/06/how-women-will-be-hurt-by-gay-marriage.html

(DO read the comments.)

(1) The van's A/C will cost more to fix than I can handle with J facing unemployment. Therefore, it will not be fixed at this time.

(2) Hangtag on front door, from the city, informs us that the HUGE double-trunk elm in our back yard has the disease and must come down. They will send a follow-up letter. At the old house, when we had to take down an elm the city gave us the option of the city doing it and adding the cost to the property taxes over a period of years. I sure hope they're still doing that. But I expect that our cooling bills will go up and our property value will go down.

(3) J may have to have a minor medical procedure. (Please do not worry; we'll let you know if there is anything to worry about.)

(4) I got home from picking up P at work to discover that I had turned the slow cooker on to "keep warm" rather than "high" (my other slow cooker has "high" in the position this one has "keep warm") and thus the food I was making for dinner is now unsafe to eat because it was at too low a temp to actually cook.

92.3 degrees, on the way to the high 90s. Humidity 45%. Dew point 64 degrees, heat index 97 degrees. Possibility of thunderstorms.

Oh joy. Rain in the high 90s.

Our son wants to sell his car, which is in our garage. It looks good and is good mechanically except that the A/C isn't working (which he will take into consideration in pricing it--he is looking at Blue Book values). About 48,000 miles on it. Email me at cak hyphen edit at comcast dot net if you are interested.

Our son is OK; he reports massive delays.

ETA: He wasn't on the train, but it was his line.

You know that "dolphin-safe" tuna? Do you know what the price is to save one dolphin? I didn't, till I followed links in gmcdavid's LJ. (Thanks!)

How much is one dolphin worth?

Differential costs of fishing with dolphin sets versus sets on floating objects

1 dolphin =

* 25,824 small tuna
* 382 mahi-mahi
* 188 wahoo
* 82 yellowtail and other large fish
* 27 sharks and rays
* 1 billfish
* 1,193 triggerfish and other small fish
* 0.06 sea turtles

http://www.ejfoundation.org/page173.html

My van's A/C quit, and today I will find out how much to repair it (which might not happen). But in looking at it, the guys at Amigo (whom I totally trust) said I really, really, really need new tires--that being a safety thing, it will get done.

Twenty percent of people under 18 in Missouri are "food insecure" (are hungry or at risk of hunger) [http://feedingamerica.org/our-network/the-studies/~/media/Files/research/child-food-insecurity.ashx], and here's what a state senator--the chairwoman of the Missouri House Special Standing Committee on Children and Families, says to do about it:

Can’t they get a job during the summer by the time they are 16? Hunger can be a positive motivator. What is wrong with the idea of getting a job so you can get better meals? Tip: If you work for McDonald’s, they will feed you for free during your break.

http://thinkprogress.org/2009/06/21/cynthia-davis-hunger/

Work-safe unless you have a really nasty-minded workplace:

http://www.culturepub.fr/videos/rubber-cement-colle-les-nonnes.html

First, I wish a happy Father's Day to the best father around, my spouse and partner in this parenting deal, Jonathan. "Thank goodness I'm doing this with you" has been heard (from either of us to the other) a zillion times in the past almost-26 years.

Second, happy Father's Day to my bro, a single dad for nearly 17 years, who has done an amazing job and raised a wonderful daughter.

Third, the same wish to all of you, no matter what your gender or your relationship to the child (of whatever age), who are doing the work of a father to the best of your ability.

Fourth, a bit of reminiscing (some copied from previous posts) about my father, Charles Patrick Kennedy, 1921-86.

When I was a kid, the work around our home was pretty strictly gender-divided; but if one looks at his entire married life, the only things I can think of that only my father did [in our household] were fixing electrical stuff (he was an electrician by trade), working on the car, and shooting the dog. He did change with the times and with changed household circumstances.

He taught me (mostly by my watching him) to fix some things around the house, he taught me gun safety, he taught me (by example) to stand up straight, and he taught me (again, by example) that sometimes you have to get things done even if your knees hurt like hell.

My father was a verbally abusive alcoholic. But he valued my intelligence and even, at least when he was sober, my independent mind and argumentativeness--until we disagreed on Vietnam and particularly draft resisters. He didn't praise my appearance, but neither did he denigrate it--the only comment I remember at all is that once he said I looked prettier without makeup--nor was he given to making remarks about women's appearance in general; he definitely gave off vibes that looks weren't particularly important, although he himself was a very good-looking man. (His granddaughter, who knows him only from pictures, says he was "hot.")

He could have been a better father for me, but he also could have been much, much worse: looking back, I know that the ways in which he wasn't good affected my life far less than the ways in which he was good.

Almost the last words he ever said to me were "I always did the best I could for you kids and your mother."

Almost my last words to him were "I always knew that, Dad."

"Generally, the most serious moral decisions consist in drawing the dividing line between what is permitted and what is forbidden in zones which themselves are 'median' and resistant to familiar dichotomies."
Paul Ricoeur, in Oneself as Another

Most of two packs of Filmograph E3 Eagle Turquoise drawing leads 6375--these exact packages: http://www.leadholder.com/lead-turq-filmograph.html

These are pretty light, so I would mail. (skylarker can probably use them, but is deferring to anyone who knows they have use for them.)

Because certainly adulterous straight marriage is better than faithful same-sex marriage!

http://www.queerty.com/anti-gay-marriage-sen-john-ensign-not-doing-great-upholding-sanctity-of-straight-marriage-20090616/

Thanks to supergee.